SPRING HAS SPRUNG
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Back to the matter at hand.
Have you noticed how we seem to not be able to imagine a future, an alternative to the life we lead these days?
How our deepest desire is to return to "normal", which means basically return to 2019 as if the last two years had never happened.
So I got to wonder what that was all about. Clients tell me that they have lost themselves, that they are unable to find their creativity or their desire to travel.
Have you also noticed that two years after the end of our world, no one seems to be mentioning the Pandemic anymore? The News has moved on to a different type of disaster.
On my morning's walk, a long one as the weather was kind, I got to thinking about all of this and the Spring Equinox. The third one since the world stopped.
Equinox, equal night and day. Balance. Planting Seeds for the Future. That is the traditional meaning of the Festival.
There has been such a lack of balance in our world for the past two years! We have lived day to day in a state of high anxiety, dealing with many confusing pieces of information, lost in the fear of the unknown, forbidden the most basic of human contacts.
This type of stress causes "Burn Out" or PTS (Post Traumatic Stress) - for more information about this please check out this article by Eve Ettinger
And one of the symptoms of both is an inability to think or plan for the future!
Today, as I prepare for the ceremony, I do not see how I can celebrate balance or indeed any possible future, stuck as I am in an endless loop of bafflement and fear.
Of course, I started tapping as I walked. "Even though I have no idea why I cannot think about the future, why I seem to have left all of my hopes and ambitions somewhere behind me, I accept myself.'
I quickly found myself returning to March 17th, 2020, and the memory of my incredulous tears as I watched my emails CANCELLED - CANCELLED - CANCELLED. All the festivals and gigs I was booked for as Baya The Storyteller went, one after the other, and as I remembered that time, tears of sadness and fear came.
I tapped, of course, to help me process these difficult feelings.
Then, I realized that something odd had happened to me.
A part of me, the hopeful Storyteller who was looking forward to her biggest international season ever, was stuck in time, stuck THEN! She was waiting for the nightmare to be over and for things to get back to "normal".
She had no idea that it was not a bad dream. That the Pandemic was still going on two years later. She just wanted to wake up and find that things were fine once again.
And isn't it what we all really want?
It is not over, not really and no, it is not a nightmare we will wake from.
However, we survived and we need to get those hopeful, engaged parts of us back into our energy fields so that we can start dreaming again. So that we can start creating a better world. So that we can see alternatives to what is going on right now in the world.
So I tapped "Even though, there is a part of me (70% in fact) who does not want to accept the past two years were not a bad dream, I accept myself anyway" "And I really really need that part of me to come and join me today on the 20th March 2022 because, without her, I cannot dream or indeed create a future for myself and the people I love."
It took a while but I eventually managed to pull myself together again. And then I remembered how, in December 2020, I had put all of my storyteller's costumes in a suitcase, locked away. So I went home, got them all out. Got rid of the ones that no longer fit me and put the rest in my wardrobe. Because I might not be THAT Storyteller anymore but I am open to telling stories again!
So, this Spring Equinox, I invite you to do the same.
What part of you have you left behind in 2020. What does he/she/they represent for you? Do you want/need her/him/them back?
if you find her, get them back on board.
Then go and buy a pack of seeds and start writing your plans for the summer, together.
Write your plans on a label and stick it on the pack of seeds and put it under that full moon still in the sky.
When (and only when the time is right - it will say on the pack), plant them and watch them grow. Water them, transplant them, help them to be strong and hearty as you will your future dreams.
And by Lunnhasa (5th August) you will be reaping your fruits/vegetables/flowers!
I would love to know if all of this resonates in any way.
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